Parenting Advice ~ This Parenting Style Sends Cruel Messages to Kids!

Category            

Parenting Skills

Parenting Tips by Jean Tracy, MSS, for grades K-6:

Are your children lively, noisy, and difficult to raise? Do you wish they’d calm down. Is your patience wearing thin?

Today’s Agenda for Building Character in Kids:

·         In our last post we discussed the tender style of parenting.

·         We noted the differences between tender and “too tender.”

·         Today we’ll examine some parenting advice from Frederick Douglas.

·         We’ll also discuss the “too tough” style of parenting.

Raising kids isn’t easy. When you’re tired, worried, and at your wits’ end, parenting is downright tough. Yet, parenting is the most important job in the world. Frederick Douglass, a leading spokesperson for the abolition of slavery and for racial equality, had this to say,

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.”

There are many ways to break a child’s spirit. Let’s examine being “too tough.” When you’re at your wit’s end, it’s easy to call your child names, like brat, stupid, or just yell, “Shut up!” Recently, Alec Baldwin, the movie star, got caught yelling “Pig!” at his eleven year-old daughter. Sure, he was frustrated. He may have had his reasons. On the other hand, consider a child who is yelled at, called names, and put down by the most important person in her life, her parent. What might such a child think?

10 Inner Messages Kids Could Receive from Parents Who Are “Too Tough:”

·         My parent hates me.

·         I’m not good enough.

·         I hate my parent.

·         I’m stupid.

·         I never do anything right.

·         I’m a failure.

·         Why try?

·         Who cares?

·         Nobody likes me.

·         I wish I was dead.

Parenting Advice – Negative Messages versus Positive Messages:

Frederick Douglass was right. A child, who hears negative messages and thinks negative thoughts, grows up with a broken spirit. Why not take the easier route and build strong children with positive messages? Why not be kind and firm?

If you had parents who frequently send you negative messages, do you remember how you thought and felt? Would you share some of your reactions with us?

In our next post, we’ll look at a quote from Ron Wild. We’ll also examine how to be tough but not “too tough.”

If you liked these parenting tips, pick up our FREE Parenting Tips - 21 of the Best at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com   where you’ll find them at the top of the page.

Subscribe to our FREE Parenting Newsletter and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids.

If you’d like to sharpen your parenting skills, check out our Parenting Skills Kit  with its Kind and Firm “Discipline Stick”. Now is a great time to build character.