Antibullying – Turning Cautious Kids into Courageous Helpers

10 Child Sayings
 
Self-Talk Influences Thoughts, Feelings,
and Behaviors

Bully prevention by playground kids takes bravery and positive thinking. This blog tells you how. You will find 3 discussion dilemmas and a gift of 10 positive slogans to help your child choose right over wrong. Your right-minded kid could become a playground hero.

Parents tell kids, “Don’t slump! Straighten up!” Sagging shoulders with head down look sad, weak and are targets for bullies.

 

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Slumped Shoulders and
Head Down = Bully
Target

 Our body’s trunk, keeps our shoulders straight. A straight body with head up looks strong and confident. Practice standing with your child. Teach your youngster to keep trunk, head, and shoulders straight.

Your Child’s Mindset

You can teach your child to strengthen her mindset by teaching right from wrong. Mindsets include thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Kids who know the difference between right and wrong and choose what’s right have strong characters. Help your child think ahead and prepare to act. Problem dilemmas like these 3 bullying situations can do just that.

The Playground Bully 

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Playground Bully

John is big and strong. He wants kids to know it. Joey is little. His posture looks wimpy.

  1. Is it OK for John to physically shove and punch Joey? Why?
  2. How would you feel if you were Joey?
  3. Should you and other kids stand by and let John bully Joey? Why?
  4. Would you do this or something else that helps the victim?                             
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How Would You Help a Victim?

Determine if your child’s mindset is strong. Does he choose right over wrong? Unassertive kids might say, “I don’t know” or shrug their shoulders. Their parents have work to do.

Sarcastic Bully

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Sarcastic Bully

 Gina has a big mouth. She’s funny and sarcastic. Tammy is shy and quiet. Her shoulders slump.

  1.  Is it OK for Gina to make fun of Tammy and put her down? Why?
  2. How would you feel if you were Tammy?
  3. Would you join the other kids and laugh at Tammy?
  4. What would you do?
  5. Is there a way to help Tammy? How?
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    Would You Get Help from a Teacher?

If your child is clueless, you need to work on her mindset.

The Tormenting Bully

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Lucas Wants Gail's Attention

Lucas is your friend. Lucas pesters girls by teasing, pulling hair, and tripping.

Lucas has a crush on Gail and wants her attention. Gail has long braids. Lucas yanks them. Gail shouts, “Stop it!” At other times, Lucas says, “You’re so stuck up.” Gail walks away. When Lucas tripped Gail and she fell, he laughed.

  1. How would you feel if you were Gail?
  2. What would you like to tell Lucas?
  3. Would you keep him for a friend?
  4. Would you help Gail? How?
Black Boy Non-Bully SMALL
 
Would You Yell, "Lucas, Stop!"

 

Your child’s answers tell you a lot. Does he know the difference between right and wrong? Do you need to guide his mindset?

How to Teach Right and Wrong - 3 Keys

These three ways will help you coach your child:

  1. Ask him about his feelings regarding a troubling situation. Does he feel for the victim or the bully?
  2. Question his thinking about the bullying. 
  3. Probe about his behaviors. Would he help the bully or the victim?

Empathic kids with right-minded thoughts will rescue victims.

Thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are the three elements that create a weak or solid character. If your child chooses what is right, his/her mindset is solid.

If not, use friendly discussions by asking questions, listening well, and giving your opinion last. Don’t force your ideas, just express them. Otherwise, your child may rebel.

I invite you to use the above 3 discussion dilemmas.

Here are the 10 self-talk sayings to help your child deal with bully situations. You can also teach your child to make their own self-talk sayings.

Indian Boy Powerpt.
 
10 Free Slogans to Discuss with Your
Kids
Insert gift code
 SLOGANS and download your gift.

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Turn Your Sad Child into a Happy Thinker – 5 Easy Steps

Frustrated boy SMALL
 
"Nobody likes me."

 

This sad boy talks to himself constantly. He tells himself self-pity thoughts. Find out how to help him.
People talk to themselves a lot. Often, they’re not aware of what they tell themselves.
When their thoughts are happy and healthy, they feel strong and positive.
When their thoughts are sad and filled with self-pity, they feel weak and miserable.

Girl laughing
 
You CAN help your child choose how to think.

 

How can you help your child become

a strong happy thinker? Here’s how:


Pick up your free Happy Thinker Exercise at https://www.KidsDiscuss.com  Insert the code word - THINKER and download your gift.



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Parents - Write Your Own Children's Book - Free Training

 

Author Miriam 450
 
Miriam Laundry, Author, Teacher, Publisher

 

This Got My Friend a Ted Talk!

Have you ever thought about how publishing your own book could open doors in your career?

I was just talking to Miriam, and she was telling me about the time she self-published her first children’s book. It gave her more opportunities than she could’ve imagined.

 It actually gave her so many opportunities that she went on to publish 5 bestselling and award-winning children’s books.

After publishing, she won a Guinness World Record™…

I purchased this book. It revealed the thoughts and feelings of a fearful child. The twist at the end surprised me. Does your child have a big bad bully in her life? 

 

Miriam Laundry 624
 
Choose Miriam for Writing, Editing, and Publishing -
Free Training 

 

Find Out How to Register Now: Free Training  

 

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Does your child ask you for money? Wonderful! Pick up my select businesses for children. They'll earn their own money and stop asking you. Go to www.kidsdiscuss.com and insert the code word - JOBS. Then download 9 businesses your child can start.

Check out my friend's, Mara Williams, excellent business books for kids. They are fun to read and show kids exactly what to do to run their own businesses. Get them on Amazon now. https://www.amazon.com/s?https://amzn.to/3RNmfZ0

Boy dogbigstockphoto 


Bullying - Stop Your Child from Being Bullied!

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You Can Help Your Bullied Child

 

The Bullied Child - How Parents Can Help

Bullying is a big deal. When a bullied child fills his mind with revenge, bad things can happen.

Or he thinks thoughts like:

  1. Nobody likes me.
  2. I’m so ugly.
  3. I’m stupid.

His mind recycles many painful thoughts. He may turn his pain into self-shame.

In this post, I will share how a parent of elementary age children can counsel their bullied child with ideas that work.

How Your Bullied Child Is a Big Deal for the You

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Raising a Bullied Child Hurts You Too

 

Imagine your child, Samuel, hates school. You talk to his teacher. She says, “Your child is being bullied and he has no friends.”

You learn what kids yell at him and it breaks your heart because the name-calling happens over and over.

Now Sam avoids eye contact. He doesn’t talk. He stays alone in his room. Lately, he pouts, grunts his answers, and often cries. His behavior hurts you because you love him so much.

Parents and Son
 
Parents Comforting Bullied Son

What can you do?

  1. Go to him. Hug and hold him gently. Say, “I know something is wrong.”
  2. Tell Sam what you’ve noticed about his behavior that tells you he’s unhappy.
  3. Ask him, “What’s going on, Sam?”

The Pillow Punching Technique

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Teach the Pillow Punching Technique

 

If Sam cries or just grunts say, “Here’s a way to let your feelings out. Take this pillow. Punch it as hard as you can. Do it over and over until you feel better. I’ll be here if you need me.”

When Sam’s done ask, “What was that all about?”

Listen without interruption. When he stops talking say, “Tell me more.”

The Stress Drawing Technique

Boy drawing
 
Guide with the Stress Drawing Technique

 

The painful picture:

Tell Sam to draw a picture of his feelings. The picture could be dark scribbles, a stick picture of himself, or something else. Say, “Tell me about your picture.”

Appreciate what your child told you. Say, “Thank you for sharing your pain with me.

The positive picture

Ask Sam to:

  1. “Draw a picture of how you would like things to be.”
  2. “Brainstorm 3 good ideas to try for making your positive picture come true.”

The Bullying Plan

Because bullying is a big deal, include your child in the plan. Make sure he will cooperate. Tell him, “No one deserves to be bullied and that means you.” Here's How:

Make a Bullying Plan with Your Child  - Read How

In this article you'll also find important tips to help your bullied child make friends.

 

Watch this short video together. 

Bullying – How Parents Help Kids Choose Kindness 

 



Related Product: Social Skills Kit for Kids

Social Skills Kit Best

 

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Family Vacations - 15 Conversations for Carefree Travelers

 

Family

Conversation starters are perfect for vacations. Children get to speak, and you get to hear what they really think. Your kids get to hear what you think too.

Boy watch time
 
"One, Two, Three -GO!"

 

Time how long each person speaks. One minute is good for starters. 

Rule: No interrupting!

The first speaker picks his conversation from an envelope (see below). No peeking!

 

Boy 800
 
This child is thinking before he speaks.

 

                  
 

The timer starts only when the speaker starts. When the speaker is finished, the group may ask him questions or give their opinions.

He then chooses the next person to speak. (Make sure everyone has a turn.)

 

Girl

 
This girl is visualizing her answer first.

 

If a member wants their turn to be a previous person’s topic, time them for one minute. Then that person picks the next speaker.

 

Mom
 
Mom is thinking whether to answer this question or the
previous one.

 

Note. The group can use the same conversation opener for everyone. Otherwise, each member can pick their own conversation. .

 

Dad
 
Dad is smiling as he thinks.

Suggestion:

Put the Conversation Starters in an envelope, purse, or backpack. Make them easy to find.

Whether you're going on a trip, a car ride, or a fun night at home, use these conversation openers. They're a great way to feel warm and cozy as a family. Remember, if f your having fun, your doing it right.

Get all 15 conversations starters. Insert code: CAR and download at www.KidsDiscuss.com  - They're FREE!

 

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Dr. King's Dream - How Kids Choose Praise Over Gossip

 
 
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WE CARE FOR EACH OTHER

 

Gossip and Looking for the Worst in Others

Meet Alexa and Tony. Both are gossipy 10 year-olds. They like bad-mouthing the kids in their 5th grade. It helps them feel superior. 

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"He thinks he's so cool." 

 

Alexa: Did you see Noah's glasses?

Tony: "So ugly!"

Alexa: “I agree.”

Tony: "Nobody likes him."

Alexa: "He thinks he so cool."

Tony: “Yah. He has the biggest house in town.”

Alexa: “They have 2 Teslas in their garage.”

Tony: "He’s so spoiled. He gets everything he wants."

Alexa: "Right! I hate hearing him brag about his video games."

Because Noah had more toys, the biggest house, and expensive cars, they felt envious. They told themselves, “I’m not spoiled like Noah. I’m better than him.” 

If looking for the worst in others become a habit, Alexa and Tony could become gossipy adults.

 

 Praise and Looking for the Best in Others

Diverse Boys Computer 725
 
Calvin Complimenting Noah

 

Meet Calvin. He’s in the same 5th grade as Alexa and Tony.

His easy laughter and friendly smiles draw kids to him. 

Noah asked Calvin to his birthday party. Noah didn’t invite Alexa and Tony. Calvin noticed that mostly adults and few classmates attended. 

“I like how you made your invitations, Noah, especially with your cat pawing the cake. Would you help me draw like you?" 

Later, Calvin asked if they could play video games.

Calvin Choosing Praise Over Gossip

When they finished, Calvin told Noah, “You're good at making those car racing decisions.” Everybody agreed. Noah felt like he was starting to fit in. He smiled at Calvin for helping him.

Calvin looks for the good and finds it. He shared it with Noah too.

Other students sense Calvin's positivity and want to be his friend.

If Calvin makes "looking for the good" a habit, he could become an effective leader today and in the future.

 

What Do You Think?

How did Alexa's and Tony’s mindsets differ from Calvin’s?

Who, in your judgment, had the better attitude?

If you chose Calvin’s attitude, check out the following Slide Share.

 

Dr. Martin Luther King's Dream - How Kids Pay It Forward

In this slide share you’ll find 3 ways to seek and share the good in others. And 3 ways to seek the good outside the family. My Family Compliment Weekend, a special technique, is waiting inside for you.

Watch Now!

 

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Content of Character - Teach Your Kids to Love Like This

Dr. MLK Love 800
 
"There's Something about Love that Builds Up and Is Creative."

Martin Luther King, Jr. wanted his four little children (and all people) judged by the "content of their character," not "the color of their skin." Dr. King believed in love not hate. Find out how character, judgment and love fit together in a way Dr. King might approve.

Effective parents teach children to judge. Not by skin color but by searching for the good.

Today, I’ll share how this love works through the story of Gabby, a family activity, and an activity that increases others’ self-esteem. It creates friendships too.

Practice it in your home. I guarantee it will boost your family’s love. Then watch it spread outward from your family to others.

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Dad, I like how you take the time to play UNO with me.

The Story of Gabby

(To protect privacy, all the names are changed because the people are real.)

Gabriella, 13 years-old, is taking a peer coaching class. She assists Mrs. Matlin, who teaches 10 special needs children, like:

  1. Daniel, who repeatedly runs around the room
  2. Lucas, who lets out blood curdling screams that make everyone jump.
  3. Olivia, who stutters and gets mad if asked questions she doesn’t want to answer.

 

  1. Bigstock-girl 25718705 500
     
    "I said, don't call on me.!"

 

Find out how Gabby's family activity influenced her with these special needs children. Then consider adopting their simple family ritual:

How Kids Judge Others by the "Content of Their Character"

Dr. King was right. "There is something about love that builds up and is creative." 

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Judging - Skin Color or Character? Teach Your Kids This

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How the Family Makes His Dream Come True

 

August 28, 1963, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. delivered his “I Have a Dream” speech. He told the crowd he wanted his four little children to be judged by the “content of their character,” not by the color of their skin.  You can make his dream come true.

Today, my new video will share 2 simple activities to teach your children. It promotes judging others in a way, I believe, Dr. King would approve.

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Teaching Children To Find the Good in Each Member

 

First Character Building Activity

Gather your family together once a week. Pick a member's name from a special bowl. Each member tells the person with the name they picked an honest compliment. What's this got to do with judging character and Dr. Martin Luther King?  'Judging' includes the good qualities you see in each other. 

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"Gabby, I like how nicely we talk to each other. You're
the best sister ever."

 

Second Character Building Activity 

Each member looks for the good in friends, classmates, and teachers. You'll see in the video how simple it is. Your children pay forward what they learned within your family. Imagine them sharing their experiences at your next family dinner.

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Toby, your speech about Dr. King was so interesting.

 

Hopefully friends, classmates and teachers will also spread the good they find in others. Why? Because to 'judge' by looking for the good in others makes both the giver the receiver feel great.

It all starts in the family.

Enjoy this video now.  How Children Promote Dr. Martin Luther King's Dream

                                    

 

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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How Children Learn Goal-Setting with Positive Self-Talk

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Children CAN learn to control their self-talk.

Lou Tice, speaker, motivator and founder of the Pacific Institute, taught the 3 parts in goal-setting. He said that good goal-setting starts with the thought, then the picture, and then the emotions that go with them. When we put them altogether, they become our self-talk. He said  "Control your self-talk and you control your life."

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Speaker and
Motivator

Many years ago, I viewed a film in which he taught goal-setting. Immediately, I saw its value. I knew I could teach this technique to adults and children in my counseling practice. The following is an example:

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I can't.

Fearful Negative Self-Talk

  1. The thought - “I can’t give my book report in front of the class.”
  2. The picture – the class is making fun of me.
  3. The emotion - fear

When we say, see, and sense it altogether and keep recycling it, it becomes our painful reality. As Lou Tice said, “We move toward our pictures (the pictures in our head).

We don’t have to think negatively. We can control our lives with positive self-talk. We can teach our children to set goals with positive self-talk too. But how? I'll show you soon.

Brave Positive Self-Talk

  1. The thought - “I am giving my book report with confidence.” (Use “I am” as if it is happening now.)
  2. The picture – The class is listening and smiling. (Look at what you would see, not yourself – see your class.)
  3. The emotion - confidence.
  4. Finally, put the positive thought, picture and emotion all together in one moment and do it each morning and night. This is the way to set goals, be successful and create a happier life.

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We can control our destiny by controlling our self-talk. Let’s instruct our minds to create positive pictures with positive self-talk using this simple method.

This video shows you how:

 

                                                        

 

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